A woman who had been married three times walked into a bridal shop one day and told the sales clerk that she was looking for a wedding gown for her fourth wedding.

“Of course, madam”, replied the sales clerk, “exactly what type and color dress are you looking for”?

The bride to be said, “A long frilly white dress with a veil”.

The sales clerk hesitated a bit, then said, “Please don’t take this the wrong way, but gowns of that nature are considered more appropriate for brides who are being married for the first time…for those who are a bit more innocent, if you know what I mean?  Perhaps ivory or sky blue would be nice”?

“Well,” replied the bride to be, a little peeved at the clerk’s directness, “I can assure you that a white gown would be quite appropriate.  Believe it or not, despite all my marriages, I remain as innocent as a first-time bride.  You see, my first husband was so excited about our wedding that he died as we were checking into our honeymoon hotel.  My second husband and I got into such a terrible fight in the limo on our way to our honeymoon  hotel that we had our wedding annulled immediately and never spoke to each other again”.

“What about your third husband”? asked the sales clerk.

“That one was a Democrat”, said the bride to be, “and every night for four years he just sat on the edge of our bed and told me how good it was going to be, but, nothing ever happened”.

About Your Uncle Fester

American. III. Sheepdog. First Responder at Camp Keebler.
This entry was posted in HELLO...anyone there. Bookmark the permalink.

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